Dear Gloria Steinem:


Todd Akin, the Republican nominee for Missouri senator, is in hot water.

If you haven’t been keeping up, here’s the deal: In response to a question on the abortion issue, he said some politically stupid things. But was he wrong? No, he was not.

The hubbub rests on two comments by Akin. One included the term legitimate rape. There is no such thing as illegitimate rape, the left-wingers are screaming. It’s always legit, if a woman says so.

Actually, illegitimate rape, fake rape, is a weapon that women have used against men for centuries. Ask a cop or almost anyone in the law-enforcement field.

Akin’s second booboo was stating that pregnancy from rape is rare because women have an inner physical protection when raped. Doctors have told him that, says Akin.

I have no idea, nor does anyone else, if this is true. I do believe strongly in mind-body connections, and it could be true, but don’t hold me to that. But it’s possible.

While we’re on this topic, let’s look at another radical feminist law: Women are never, ever at fault even a little bit when raped. Never. No way, José.

This is malarkey.

Let me give you just one example. A coed goes to a frat party and chugs half a liter of José Cuervo. She is steered, lurching, into a back bedroom for a private party with one or more of the frat guys while she’s unconscious.

Legally, is this rape? Quite probably. Was she partially to blame? You betcha.

Plenty of other examples are available to demonstrate that women can be partially to blame for their own rapes, but I’ll stop at this one.

Akin is facing lots of guff from the left-wing media and hysterical feminists, but I hope he hangs in there. We need as many Republicans in the Senate as possible, even those who don’t know when to keep their mouths shut.

Perhaps a class in Politically Correct Speech at the University of Missouri would serve him well, or any course at the Women’s Studies Department.

40 thoughts on “Dear Gloria Steinem:”

  1. Oh… oh…oh… Felipe. I have often wondered if you are losing your marbles and even more often, I have wondered why you have a need to offend almost everyone. Most of the time, I have restrained myself from responding to your provoking diatribes because I know that nothing rocks your socks more than a “ranting female.” But today Old Sod… silence is impossible. I am not going to get into just how much your post offends me… and I won’t tell you on how many levels… and I won’t tell you why this is so. I will just say: SHUT UP when you have no idea what you are talking about.


    1. Ms. Merida: I made three points.

      1. Fake rape exists. Illegitimate rape, in Atkin’s words.

      2. Women’s bodies might have some inner defenses we don’t know about to deter pregnancy in some rape cases. I said this was impossible to prove.

      3. Women can be partially to blame when they are raped.

      Leaving No. 2 out of the discussion because there is no way to know, which of the other two do you disagree with? And give examples to prove your point, please.

      I am open to logic and reason, as always.


      1. There are some things that defy “logic and reason.” They cannot be “explained” The hurt goes so deep… there are no words.

        Sr. Felipe, the fact that you wrote this post in the first place, followed by your lack of compassion to followup commentary makes me conclude that you have never had to deal with the pain and shame of having been raped yourself, nor have you had to watch helplessly while someone you love goes through the agony of the aftermath of a rape.

        You used to quote Emily Dickinson… maybe her words will bring you to some semblance of understanding:

        “There is a pain—so utter—
        It swallows substance up—
        Then covers the Abyss with Trance—
        So Memory can step
        Around—across—upon it—
        As one within a Swoon—
        Goes safely—where an open eye—
        Would drop Him—Bone by Bone”


        1. Ms. Merida: I wrote this post due to the uproar over Atkin. It’s all over the news. I have addressed other fiery issues in the news in the past, and I will do so in the future.

          Now, if we can put aside the hysterics and the Emily Dickinson quotes (where is the stirring violin crescendo?) I say — once again — if you can refute — or even attempt to rebut — my points, please let’s hear it.


  2. Offhand, I can think of 5 ladies/teens who were raped, and I know them very well indeed. Of the five, 2 conceived a child. The first was a 14 year old virgin raped by a senior in high school who cornered her in a school bus after a football game. No one in the community believed that it was not consensual.She bore a child who was put up for adoption. She never forgave herself for being the last one off the bus, beguiled by a handsome boy who wanted to talk with her. Another 14 year old that I knew needed hospitalization for physical care, and later for psychiatric care because she was consumed with rage and shame. Another 20 something year old who was my supervisor at the time was assaulted when she left work for her car parked in an empty parking lot. She was the bravest of the lot, and she brought much needed attention to the problem of young clerks leaving the mall at late hours alone. The fourth friend was assaulted in her home by a stranger who had broken into her apartment. She moved away to try to escape the shame. The final rape was upon a young girl by her father, whose child she bore. Her brother tried to murder his father. You, sir, are willfully ignorant of the pain of rape. As I write, I think of more and more women who have shared their stories with me.

    And women are not the only victims. I nearly lost a15 year old male student to suicide who had been brutally raped by a stranger who kidnapped him near his school. By God’s grace, his younger brother found him hanging in a closet before it was too late. Was it his fault that he was handsome and maybe a tad effeminate at age 14? Let’s put the blame on him! If he had been an ugly lad, he would not have been violated by a pervert.

    No doubt there are people who cry rape when it is not the case. Yet, we must have mercy and compassion on those who may not be telling the whole story because if we do not, the ones who are the real victims will refuse to come forward because of the callous attitude of men who refuse to open their hearts to truth. I will not come back to read your rebuttal. Doubtless, you will dismiss my commentary as feminist ranting. So be it. I stand with the women and men who have been raped as well as the children who were born in these horrific attacks.

    I agree with the other two commenters. I call for you to refrain from commenting on things that display your ignorance and lack of judgment.


    1. Laurie: Your comment has nothing to do with the post. Let me recap.

      1. Illegitimate rape (fake rape accusations) exists.

      2. Let’s leave this one out of the discussion. I wish Akin had not said it. It’s impossible to prove and quite likely is not true. I admit that.

      And the final is mine, not Akin’s.

      3. Women can share the blame for being raped. I gave one example. Here is another. A woman meets a man online, and agrees to go to his apartment for a drink to kick off the first date. She gets raped by that stranger. It was really dumb for her to go there. In my book, she shares the blame. There are plenty of other examples one can cite.

      This is not to say that plenty of rapes happen in which the woman is 100 percent a victim, of course. You cite some. However, the feminist line that women never are at fault in any way is simply untrue.

      But I say again, your response had nothing to do with the post or the points made. Feel free to try again, addressing the issues I raised specifically.


      1. This may be hard for you to believe, but I know this is true. I knew a former nun who had been a schoolmate of mine in high school. She rented an apartment near my place. She was very naive. She met a man online. They had a date in a public place. She agreed to talk further in his car. He proceeded to sexually assault her. He stopped before penetration due to her volatility. However, I think she was completely unaware of the dangers that she had been exposed too. Today she is a university professor. She is not dumb. She was not too blame. You paint a wide brush, sir. But of course, you are never wrong. Why did I come back? I will not rebut again. Paint me as a hysteric. I don’t care.


    1. Ms. Merida: As I told Laurie, her response had nothing to do with my post. It was an emotional outburst on her part.

      If any of you three can calm down long enough to read the post carefully and respond to the points made, well, that would be nice.

      I wait…but not optimistically.


  3. I cannot agree with your statement:

    “Legally, is this rape? Quite probably. Was she partially to blame? You betcha.”

    OF COURSE it is rape. A lack of judgement in the amount one imbibes does not make them partially responsible for being raped. Taking advantage of someone with diminished capacity regardless of how they got to that place is as criminal an act as it would be were they totally lucid (probably more so) – period.

    Really hombre, society demands people conduct themselves at least a little higher than a neanderthal.


    1. Ah, at last, something approaching rationality. I thank you, John.

      We’ll have to disagree on whether the coed shared the blame. I believe that she did because she should have known better. Girls getting blotto at frat parties and then waking up the next morning with their pants down is an old story, and everybody knows it.

      The girl’s actions heavily contributed to her being raped, and I think that makes her partly (partly, I say) to blame.

      You are quite free to see it otherwise, and again thanks for the calm and related comment, the first so far.


    2. John: Thinking further on it, so you really think that a coed can go to a frat party, voluntarily down jelly shots till her eyes cross, wake up the next morning to notice she has been, uh, taken advantage of, and she has played absolutely no role in what happened? She is totally free of any blame? Nothing she voluntarily did led to what happened? Myself, I cannot see it that way. She shares the blame, brother.


      1. I do not think using bad judgement should saddle someone that is molested or raped with guilt of any kind. Just as I think to dress or conduct oneself in a provocative manner should make the person partially responsible for rape.

        Where do we draw the line with this? What is the crossing point of good to bad judgement (behavior)? Who should define provocative or just how much substance ingestion is too much?

        In the later part of the 20th and certainly in the 21st Century no amount of bad judgment entitles another (others) to take advantage of someone – plain and simple. The good frat house would have members that would see this lady gets home safe. See that she doesn’t drive and certainly be sure no one takes advantage of her diminished capacity.

        Today’s society has made it clear that there is NO EXCUSE for rape – no provocation will limit one’s guilt or pass it along in any amount to the victims. With this rule of law it is clear – DO NOT DO IT! We MUST respect the rights of others at all cost, in any condition and in all situations – period.


        1. Señor Calypso: You don’t think bad judgment should saddle someone with guilt of any kind? I see it otherwise. Perhaps I am a closet Catholic.

          I agree that bad judgment does not entitle others to take advantage of us, but if our lousy judgment leads us into dark waters, I vote that the person who made the lousy judgment holds a part of the blame.

          No excuse for rape? I did not say there is.

          Much of this comment of yours reflects the heart of a true libertarian, which you are.

          You would also not get tossed out of a NOW meeting. I fear I would.


  4. Screwing a women when she has had too much to drink is rape and will land you in jail for a long time. It has been that way from the time I started drinking and fooling around with females. Is what is is and making excuses for men who fail to see this makes you look bad, as it should. The idea that a female that has been raped can stop the sperm from implanting in the egg is just plain dumb or this “system of birth control” would one of the methods taught in medical school-it aint. I must say this: hands down, this is the silliest blog post you have posted to date and one of the meanest. Read what you wrote to your wife-I dare you…


    1. Norm: Okay, the coed was raped. I’ll give you that. I never said it was not. It’s not really an element in my third point that women sometimes share the blame when they are raped.

      Focus, Norm.

      I see you’re bringing up Point 2 again. I have conceded that it is totally unprovable. That’s more Akin’s deal than mine.

      You don’t mention Point 1, the most important of all in Akin’s case. Illegitimate rape (fake rape) not only exists, but has existed for centuries, a dandy tool for angry women.

      Silly? You’re stealing one of my favorite words. Not fair. Be original.

      My wife would agree with everything I wrote here.

      But you did a bit better job keeping on point than some of the previous commenters. Better than Croft, Ms. Merida and Laurie, but not as good as John Calypso.

      Croft and Ms. Merida earn an easy F. Laurie gets a D because I like her. Calypso gets a B. You get a C-minus.


      1. Writing class now, tangents you say, I’ll admit that I did not address the whole essay and I seldom do when I comment, it’s the nature of being someone who comments rather than blogging. John can write circles around me so a c- it is. I got a D from an English prof once, a Harvard man. He begged me to reconsider when I dropped his class, the Dean canned him before the next quarter. I had turned in the paper to the Dean before I gave it to the prof because I knew the guy had an agenda.

        And silly: I use silly when a person is being silly, like kids in a food fight, or a grown man who has walked the earth for six decades and still thinks a women who has been raped can of her own will decide not to get knocked up-as silly as it gets.


        1. Norm, Norm, Norm. I did not say that a woman who is raped can decide not to be knocked up. I said that I believe strongly in a mind-body connection, and that it was conceivable, no pun intended.

          Unlikely, of course, but conceivable, and that’s my opinion. Actually, I think the mind and emotions hold powerful sway over our physical condition.


  5. “Open to logic and reason”?! Anyone who claims to have been a newspaper editor should be able to see that saying that a rape victim is partially to blame because of the situation they entered is not thinking logically at all. Unless of course they believe that anyone walking down the street in a neighborhood not deemed “crime free” is asking to be robbed. The definition of all crimes is a legal one, not meant for tampering with unless one changes the legal statute.

    “Blaming the victim” is nothing new.

    And if you respond, would you please refrain from the patronizing “dear heart”.


    1. Alinde: Back again? I am like flypaper, no? Or catnip.

      But you, like most of the others, are misquoting me. I did not say “a rape victim is partially to blame.” I said that in some situations, they are partially to blame. In others, likely the great majority, they are not to blame at all. But my beef is with those who let the women off the hook 100 percent of the time. Ain’t so. It is a complex world in which we live, and so are people.

      Yes, the definition of a crime is a legal one, a point which (sigh!) has nothing to do with what I say in my post.

      I will not call you dear heart, sweetie.


  6. it seems obvious that you have never been touched by rape of family or friends. If so you wouldn’t be so flippant about it. The consequence of poor judgement should not be rape. Enjoy your day, it will be like a fencing match which I expect will please you.


    1. Shelagh: I am being flippant at times, I grant you that. It is in my genetic makeup. I am not being flippant about rape. I am being flippant with some of the commenters who are unwilling to justify themselves or address the points of my post.

      No, I have never been personally affected by rape.

      The consequence of poor judgment should not be rape, true. But sometimes it is, and had the judgment been better the rape might not have happened. Bad judgment can lead to rape and the person whose bad judgment it was shares some of the blame. That’s how I see it. Others are free to disagree.

      Yes, at times I enjoy fencing matches. When the opponent is reasonable and keeps to the topic at hand, I like it even more. Many of the comments here so far do not rise to that standard.

      Yours did pretty good, however.


  7. Your logic is severely flawed. There seems to be no point in breaking down your arguments one by one because that would somehow seem to legitimize them. I wouldn’t argue with the crazy person on the street spewing nonsense at me, so I won’t argue with the irrational, illogical, and preposterous statements made in this post. Peace and may you never be raped, even if you would consider it partially your fault.


    1. Ms. Mami: What logic of mine is flawed? Oh, that’s right. There is no point in breaking it down, letting yourself off the hook.

      You have continued the almost unanimous trend here of simply name-calling. For that, you too receive an F.


      1. You do a little name calling yourself. You’re also taking cheap shots when you call an argument by a female ‘hysterical.’ The little corner of your mind – the one to which all your misogynistic marbles have rolled – is available for scrutiny on this one.


        1. Loulou: I do not name call. Ten bucks to you for each example you provide. I do not classify things such as “clueless” as name calling. I do enjoy using clueless but only with groups. I do not normally call an individual clueless. I try to be polite.

          Silly is another of my preferred adjectives. Today, Norm has grabbed it and turned it against me. Touché.

          And some of the comments here, to my mind, fall into the category of hysterical.

          And I’m not a misogynist in the slightest. Quite the contrary.


  8. If anything good is to come out of the comments made by Todd Aiken it is that he just may have pulled the final rug out from under Romney – Ryan.

    What Aiken said was not a “mis-speak”, “out of context quote” or even a “momentary error in judgement”. He was stating their agenda. It is the agenda of the Republican party to keep dissenting voices quietened and to push their overriding religious doctrine into every facet of life. What they tout as “religious freedom” is simply a theocracy that places limits on freedom based on a version of Judeo-Christianity that fits their liking. No other views are allowed.

    In the final stretch leading up to the convention Todd Aiken has ensured the conversation will be centred on women’s rights and abortion and not allowing it to stray into other areas where Romney feels he may have an advantage. This is why they are trying to force Aiken out, not because they disagree with him, because they do not. They are just pissed that he stated this position on camera.

    Paul Ryan’s views on rape and abortion are exactly the same as Aiken’s. In fact the two of them conspired to co-sponsor bills stating exactly that position using the same words “forcible rape”. For instance, House Resolution 212: Sanctity of Human Life Act.

    Romney’s position on abortion changes constantly depending who he is addressing and whichever way the breeze is blowing. It has covered every position from a woman’s inviolate right to choose all the way to no abortion regardless of the circumstances with every imaginable stop in between. To question his current position simply brings a quote from one of those randomly held positions, depending of course on who is asking the question.

    So Todd Aiken, thanks for clearly stating the Republican position so it can be judged for what it is worth. Hang in there.

    And no, I will not directly address Filipe’s comments. It is the same as when the grade four kid gets beaten to within an inch of his life and the four grade six perpetrators say, “He asked for it”. It is not worthy of an argument.


    1. Croft: You will not directly address my comments! Boy, you people take the cake. There was really no need to spend so much time typing your leftist perspective. We’re already familiar with it.

      Thank the Goddess you’re Canadian. One less vote for Obama.


  9. Long time lurker here. I haven’t posted a comment before, but this blog post… ugh.

    1. Fake rape exits, yes. Real rape does too and is often unreported. For every time you write that fake rape exists, please write a 100 times that real rape often goes under the radar. Just for fairness sake…

    2. The fact that you even dare mention this reveals how little you understand about biology.

    3. This is just misogyny at its best. We live in a culture where women are taught never to walk alone at night, never to get too drunk, never to leave your drink unattended, to avoid talking to strangers at night. We are told: don’t wear clothing that might be too revealing, don’t act like a slut, always go out with a friend – if you fail to follow these rules, then there is quite a big chance that you might get raped. When was the last time, you, as a man, thought about how your clothes might incite cat calling? Or rape? When was the last time you thought: “I better stop drinking now, that woman over there is rather creepy… she might be a rapist”. Why do we teach women how not to get raped, but we never teach men not to rape? Don’t you see how unfair this is?

    Comedian Ever Mainard has an excellent stand-up routine about this. Please, watch this and come back to tell us when was the last time you felt this way:

    It doesn’t matter if she was drunk. It doesn’t matter if she was wearing a mini-skirt. It doesn’t matter if she started up things. If she says: “hey, I want to stop now”, then you stop. If you go on… then yes, it is rape. “Hey – you were drunk and wearing a mini dress and you got raped? It sucks, but you were kind of asking for it!“ – there is no room for this. I am sorry, there are no grey areas here, there is no room for victim blaming and/or slut shaming – which is precisely what you are doing.


    1. BB: Ah, someone who addresses the first point of the post, finally. Yes, fake rape exists, and I think that is what Akin was referring to with his illegitimate reference. And it’s what, wrongly, got him into the most hot water.

      You add that real rape exists too. Well, sure. Who says it does not?

      On point No. 2, I am more open-minded than you on this. Akin, however, should have kept that idea to himself, however.

      The third point, which is my own, I will stick to. To say that women never shoulder any of the blame whatsoever for rape is akin to someone walking open-eyed into a thunderstorm, coming back in drenched, and saying she played no part whatsoever in getting soaked.

      It was totally Mother Nature’s fault.

      And, yet again, of course, this does not apply in most rapes. However, the bone I am picking is this rule that says women never, ever have anything to do with being raped. Not so.


  10. One of the most basic of human rights is to not have ones body penetrated against one’s will. To have someone penetrate any body orifice without one’s willing consent is a heinous violation of that persons rights as a human being whether they are female, male, child, adult, intoxicated, ignorant. It is a crime of violence and power against another person. To rationalize in any way that the victim is an any part responsible for being assaulted is to strip away the basic foundation of civilized behavior. To give credence to the Akin’s statements is to undermine the basic rights of human beings in a free society. Powerful people, albeit mostly men, have rationalized their abuse of power though out history. Whether it be the institution of slavery, unassailable power of catholic priests, an all powerful football coach, our collective outrage against the inhuman of abuse of power is what makes us a moral and just society. Mr. Akins ideas are not rational but an attempt to justify a misogynistic beliefs that undermine our just society where the rights of all are protected regardless of their ability to protect themselves.


  11. Boy, you sure stirred the pot today.

    Point 1. I’m sure we have all heard of someone who has been wrongfully accused of rape. I have. It’s devastating to all involved. But I also know the other side. I had a friend who worked as an agent for the Culinary Union. Her job took her out in the evening to different restaurants. She parked next to a van one night and when she got out of her car the van side door opened and she was thrown into the back and raped. She has never really recovered.

    Point 2. I thought this was ridiculous. Of course you can get pregnant by rape.

    Point 3. I think when a person acts foolishly they must assume some responsibility for their actions when things go wrong. Getting drunk at a frat party would be foolish behavior, especially if no one is there to look out for you.

    My friend, who was raped, taught me many things about being aware of my surroundings at all times, and how not to attract attention when alone.

    I do think Akin blew it.


    1. Ah, Jackie, thanks for passing by. A calm voice of reason. Yes, real rapes happen. And false ones too.

      On Point 2, of course one can get pregnant from rape. Neither I nor Akin (though less firmly) said otherwise.

      On Point 3, which is my personal addition to the conversation, you and I agree.

      I give you the first and only grade of A. Move to the front of the class.

      And yes, Akin blew it. It was, given political currents today, highly unwise of him to say those things.

      And with this, I am closing the comments on this post. I’m not getting enough rationality here.

      But I thank one and all for weighing in. I only had to block a couple of comments for rudeness. Not too bad.

      To sum up: I addressed Akin’s two specific points, agreeing with his first and seeing possibilities, admittedly remote, with the second. Plus, I tossed in a third point of my own.

      Readers here and Akin’s many critics took the conversation to far wider areas, over the mountains and through the valleys, seeing justifications for rape, excuses for rape, all manner of things that Akin did not say and that I would never think or say.

      Proving yet again that humans often read what they want to read and hear what they want to hear, regardless of reality.

      Good thing I am not running for public office.


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